Tips and Tricks

HOW TO HELP YOUR CHILD SLEEP

Why won't my baby sleep?

A baby's sleep pattern is controlled by two separate mechanisms: the circadian rhythm (our body clock) and the actual need for sleep (sleep pressure). Babies are born with an undeveloped circadian rhythm (the body clock). This is why it can be so difficult to see a sleep pattern, both during the day and during the night.

Breastfeeding counselor Sara Degn gives good advice about baby's sleep patterns and a good bedtime routine.

October 3, 2024

Sara Degn

Sara Degn er certificeret ammevejleder med speciale i ammeetablering og den første tid med barnet. Hun brænder for at skabe ro og tryghed i amningen gennem personlig rådgivning og faglig vejledning til nybagte mødre.

The normal sleep pattern

Babies don't need to LEARN to sleep, and that can be quite a mission if that's what parents want to achieve. Babies, like us, are very different. Some babies need help falling asleep and staying asleep, other babies don't.

But why do babies wake up so often at night? You see, babies need to be breastfed (or bottlefed) simply to survive. If you think about it, they are pretty little people, so they have to make a bit of a fuss to let their parents know that it's time to breastfeed. In addition to wanting to be breastfed or bottlefed, they also need to be kept warm, cared for, and feel safe. The way they show their parents this is by waking up at night.

Another important thing to remember when it comes to baby sleep is that they need to get used to life outside the womb. Inside the womb they get a lot of good hormones from their mother, and they live in a completely different environment, in there in the safe surroundings.

If we think about it, it actually makes sense that it can take a long time to get used to such a different environment as outside the womb. They are moved from a warm, safe, soft, dark and cozy place, to a noisy, cold and big world, outside the womb. They just have to get to know the world. This period is also called the fourth trimester. Over time, the baby will develop their own circadian rhythm. They will produce their own melatonin, and develop their own ability to
to regulate body temperature. Until then, we must arm ourselves with patience.

Putting routines

Children love predictability, and they love things to be done the same way every day. That's why it's a good idea to do roughly the same things every night when your child is put to bed, and in roughly the same order.

If your child is closer to 18 months, you can use pictograms for the putting routine. Pictograms are pictures of what needs to happen and in what order. The pictures can be hung up here and the child can point to the picture you have come to. For example, brushing teeth, putting on a diaper, etc. I will post some pictograms here in the group that you can use if you want.

First of all: Putterutine should be calm and not stressful.

I know it can be frustrating if your child only sleeps late, and there are things you want to get done before you go to bed yourself. But see if you can try to be calm about the bedtime routine.

Predictable routines throughout the day

Activities during the day that your child enjoys and see if the activities can be placed at roughly the same time during the day.

Be prepared that some days your child may be more or less tired than usual, and therefore the activities or sequence may change.

It might be a good idea to use a mini version of your evening bedtime routine for daytime naps.

You should avoid that.

Things that stress your child out

A very long cuddle routine can cause your child to lose focus and may reach a point where they are too tired to be cuddled, which will then mean that it will be longer before your child needs to be cuddled.

A very short putting routine may mean that the child does not get into gear enough to be put.

Overly strict timings are unsustainable for the parents and for the child.

Suggestions for good putting routines

Depending on age, some things can be omitted. Bath, maybe bath together?

Diapers and nightwear.

Brush teeth (if the child has teeth).

Take a goodnight walk around the house. Say goodnight to the other family members, maybe there are some pets that need to be said goodnight too? You can also say goodnight to things that the child loves, for example a tractor or a teddy bear. You can go for a walk and say goodnight to the pictures that you have hanging of family members, if you have any hanging.

Story and song (You can read a book even if baby is not very old and understands the plot) Lots of hugs, kisses and filling up on the love idea.

Breastfeed or bottle feed if your child is still receiving one of these.

With a slightly older child who has language, you may need to tell them a little about what's on your mind, but it's typically the child who is 4-5 years old who suddenly has this need. It can also happen to a younger child, and here it can be accommodated and listened to, even if you are busy with other things to do.

Put in the way that works best for you now.

Some babies and children still need to be breastfed, bottle-fed, rocked, or coaxed to sleep, if it works, then by all means continue with it.

Otherwise, you can let the child lie with you in bed. Or his own bed, if the child is in his own room you can do it there. It is important that it is the same place every night that the child is put to sleep.

The actual putting should ideally not take more than 30 minutes. If it takes longer, you may need to try at another time.

If you have any questions, you can contact Breastfeeding Counselor Sara Degn here: www.ammevejledersaradegn.dk

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